The Martians are a sapient species of grotesque humanoids from the planet Mars.
Biology[]
Martians are humanoid, but bear long claw-like fingernails, and most notably, large, almost blocky craniums with flat tops, possibly housing a far larger brain than a Human. They also have grotesque facial features, with saggy eyes and large noses. These features make their faces rather inexpressive. Their lifespans are unknown, but they are able to visibly age, gaining more wrinkles and white hair in their elder years. Their oversized craniums make them stand taller than Humans, although they appear to be quite close to Humans in terms of physical strength and durability. No females of this species has been seen by Humans, so any physical differences between Martian genders are unknown, assuming that they even have recognizable genders. They are able to somehow sculpt their bodies to perfectly mimic a Human. Despite evolving in the Martian atmosphere, they can survive perfectly well in Earth's environment.
Culture and society[]
The Martian leaders
The Martians are imperialists who sought to conquer and colonize Earth, as their own species needed more room to expand. They appear to be led by a single leader with two advisors. While their initial intent was conquest and colonization, they despised much of Earth culture, leading them to turn to destruction rather than colonization. This could imply that the Martian culture is far more "restrained" than Earth culture, as the leaders appeared startled and disgusted by the loud noises and imagery of boisterous parties, and could also imply that they initially intended to enslave or otherwise subjugate Humans and their culture rather than exterminate them. Despite this, at least some aspects of Earth culture appeared to have caught on in their society, and they observed Earth for long enough to recognize landmarks and Human technological advancements. Martians are known to commonly wear capes with high collars, and a circular insignia on their left breast. The Martian language is known to be quite complex, and often strange, as it takes a long phrase to say "idiots" in Martian.
Technology[]
The Martians had advanced spacecraft that was capable of transporting troops from Earth to Mars, as well as real-time communications systems between the two planets. They had also created at least one model of a pod-like teleportation unit, and are somehow able to reconstruct the bodies of Martians into perfect Human visages. While they developed invasion fleets of flying saucer-shaped ships and interplanetary missiles, their weapons of choice were disintegration guns, usually taking the form of handheld firearms. The most powerful known disintegration gun was a large cannon that could be mounted atop vehicles, capable of instantly disintegrating large buildings and striking other planets. Some of their technology, such as their communication screens, appear to be activated with body motions, or possibly a telepathic command.
History[]
The Stooges and Professor Danforth confront the disguised Martian agent
In the year 1962, the Martians sent an agent to Earth to study it for colonization purposes, disguising him as a Human. Taking on the role of a butler, the Martian entered the service of Professor Danforth, finding that the scientist has invented a revolutionary military vehicle, which combined elements of a submarine, tank and helicopter, to create a machine able to operate just as well in water, land, air or space. He set up a secret communications device to Mars in the castle's basement, reporting what he found to Mars. The Martian leaders, feeling threatened by this invention, ordered their agent to steal the blueprints. The agent would put on a monstrous mask and stalk the professor while doing so, presumably to hide his identity and also discredit the professor, who began spouting to others that he is being stalked by aliens. Professor Danforth soon enlisted the aid of Moe, Larry, and Curly-Joe, otherwise known as the Three Stooges, who arrive at the mansion. In an attempt to get rid of them, the Martian infiltrator is discovered, but the Stooges and the professor do not find out that he is an alien. For his failure, the Martian leaders have him sent back to Mars and replaced by two agents named Ogg and Zogg, who take over the investigation of the professor's machine and are given a Martian superweapon to use for the invasion. However, after receiving television transmissions of several aspects of Earth life, the Martian leaders were offended by Earth culture and called off the invasion, telling Ogg and Zogg to destroy Earth instead. To this end, Ogg and Zogg sought to steal the professor's vehicle, but it is taken out for a test drive by the Stooges, who drive it out into a desert and accidentally switch a component of its engine with a nuclear depth bomb, unbeknownst to the Martians. However, the Martians do see the vehicle get shot into space when Curly-Joe accidentally hits the orbit switch. After the vehicle is returned to Professor Danforth's castle, the Stooges record some footage for a rotoscoped cartoon, but then run into Ogg and Zogg, running off in fear. Ogg and Zogg steal the vehicle and attach their superweapon to it, but the Stooges manage to get onto the vehicle's exterior as the Martians take to the air, flying over Earth's surface, evading the military while disintegrating structures, although the Stooges manage to stop them from destroying Disneyland, and make them fire a blast at Mars, which damages their capital building.
The Martian leaders inexplicably dancing
While flying over the ocean, the Stooges then manage to get ahold of one of the Martians' rayguns while they tried to get the Stooges off of the vehicle, and lock the Martians in the conning tower with it. The Stooges then use the raygun to blast the conning tower, disconnecting it from the fuselage, as the conning tower is what held the propellers keeping the vehicle airborne. The fuselage, with Ogg and Zogg still on it, falls into the ocean, detonating the nuclear payload and destroying the Martians. A subsequent transmission showed the Martian commanders dancing around, indicating that they ultimately didn't very much care that their plan failed, likely because they no longer had any intention of dealing with Earth, and may have even decided to incorporate some aspects of Earth culture after all.
Appearances[]
- The Three Stooges in Orbit (1962)
Notes[]
- The Martian design bears some resemblance to the Universal film series portrayal of Frankenstein's monster. It's not clear if the similarity is intentional, though.
- Colorized versions of The Three Stooges in Orbit depicts the Martian skin tone as a pale Human-like skin tone.